CONFESSIONS OF A MARANATHA PASTOR: PART II

 

“Woe to the foolish prophets who follow their own spirit, and have seen nothing!”

Ezekiel 13:3

HUMILITY FORGED IN FIRE

I don’t know that pride is necessarily thinking too much of myself as much as it is thinking too little of God. Let’s play with that idea for a second; is it possible that my pride comes from a place in me where God is not quite worth enough to be truly known? Or maybe that knowing Him is just to difficult and requires me to give up too much of me? We are all born onto a level playing field of being possessed by a sin nature and separated from God. The culture of the world and the appetite of my flesh both drive me toward a pride that says, “I am worth being known and deserve to be known,” but in a way that makes my renown the ultimate goal. We are essentially born into a context where humility is a parasite that we need to be inoculated against, lest we lose ourselves. What we tend to miss is that pride is the parasite that we, for the sake of our lives, must find a way to expel.

Here’s the thing about pride and humility; humility is not something that we gain by teaching or effort, because pride is always actively opposing its development. Humility can only grow and develop in the soil of where Jesus’ feet have walked, and that ancient path is nothing less than the participation in His sufferings. The way suffering brings us low is like the way a fever fights infection. A fevered patient thinks they’re dying, but their body is actually striving toward life, even through the fire. Remember how Jesus shows up when His faithful are in the fire![1] Often we just take the edge off our pride rather than a ruthless pursuit to eradicate it through the fire of suffering with Christ, as if pain relief is the goal rather than “having this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, by taking the form of a servant… He humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross.”[2]

MAKE WAR ON PRIDE

So back to the main question: Is it possible that we are satisfied with letting pride rest comfortably in our flesh because it is too big of an ask for me to suffer like Jesus suffered to bring about the death of pride and birth of humility? And here’s the damning truth in treating pride this way; Christianity can be practiced without humility, but Jesus cannot be known without it. My confession is this, I don’t want humility if it means that I must suffer like Jesus, so I will do my best to follow Him at a safe distance where I may get some pain spatter off the heels of His sandals, but I won’t experience the gut-wrenching pain of participating in His sufferings. Therefore, my pride survives, and humility is halted, and I pastor my congregation and do ministry in a way that is a broken reflection of Christ rather than a dim reflection of Christ. A broken reflection will lead people to become more like me whereas a dim reflection will remind others that Jesus is better.

Let this be clear, pride is not welcome in the life of anyone who follows Jesus, full stop. There is no difference in expectation between a Jesus’ follower who gets up in the morning and works as a plumber all day verses a Jesus follower who gets up in the morning and goes to work at a church. There is, however, a difference in the impact that Jesus’ follower has on the health and focus of the church because of how we function in the church industrial complex. The pride or humility I lead with has a greater impact on the life of my local gathering than anyone else regardless of what I believe. I hate that fact, but for most of my life, I have also enjoyed the benefits of that reality. I have realized that those enjoyed benefits are also what have fed my pride and stepped in the way of walking in the humble path Jesus walked. This is not only a product of our modern practice of “doing church.” It’s also a problem that has been around for a long time. God Himself, through his prophets, confronted those tasked with leading His people.

In Ezekiel 13, God confronts other Hebrew prophets for prophesying “from their own hearts.” That is a distinct difference from the heart of God. My own heart is a heart of pride, and when I lead from it, God’s hand will be set against me. Just read Ezekiel 13 for yourself and see if it isn’t eerily like what is so often the messaging in the modern church from people like me - people who love Jesus but have lived for most of their lives in a context that prioritizes “now” more than later. The exception is a broad, generic message of salvation for many, but not to the point of inconveniencing my agenda or my legacy. I don’t want to attack pastors, or for that matter, invite attack upon myself, but the Bride of Jesus Christ cannot continue to allow people like me to live a life that lacks humility and does not ruthlessly root out pride. Let today be the last day we hear the excuse for a pastor, “He’s a bit arrogant but he’s just such a great communicator” or “I wouldn’t describe him as humble, but his church has explosive growth with campuses all over doing so much good.”

THE MARK OF HUMILITY

So, I’m no help at all unless I can suggest a better way. The easier answer is to humble ourselves before God, but, as Andrew Murray argues, our humility toward others is the only sufficient proof that our humility before God it real.[3] You can only know that I have authentic humility by my relationships with others. That’s why you can’t know the humility of a preacher you see online and don’t know in person. My humility is experienced and known in how I treat others no matter how difficult they may be - their difficulty does not exempt me from humility because my humility is an expectation of King Jesus. Particularly, as a shepherd in Christ’s church, I must take the posture of a servant giving people what they need to become like Jesus, not what they want (nor what I want) to give them. That will often result in less popularity for me, and my pride hates that. My humility before God has no value except as it prepares me to reveal the humility of Jesus to others.

I’ll finish with this from Andrew Murray, “Recently I was asked the question, ‘How can I overcome my pride?’ The answer is simple. Two things are needed. Do what God says to do: humble yourself. Trust Him to do what He says He will do: He will exalt you.”[4] And that brings me back to the beginning; pride is thinking too little of God and what He promises.

Maranatha.



Matthew has been pastoring in one form or another from the Midwest to Central California for 20 years. He and his wife are in the parenting adult children season of life.  Over the last few years, Matthew has been awakened by the Maranatha Cry and now carries with him a deep conviction to ready the church for the return of Jesus, calling the church to intimacy with Jesus and obedience by making disciples.


[1] Daniel 3
[2] Philippians 2:5-7
[3] Murray, Andrew. Humility: The Beauty of Holiness. 1884.
[4] Ibid